I have an image of someone that is always angry, someone that will be
rude and offensive. That image isn't unwarranted. I am not
a fluffy, friendly person, nor do I ever wish to be. I am about as
subtle as a sledgehammer. But mostly I am seen that way because the
other ones here people are use to dealing with tend to try to be nice all
the time, they are constantly worried what people will think of them, whereas
I don't give a flying fuck what anyone thinks of me. I will be who
I am, and I will say what I whis to. I am not so concerned with fragile
feelings or egos. All of this gets me labeled as an offensive person.
But in reality, at least to me I am just not someone that wants to be part
of a society I see as hypocritical.
I spend my days still outside the Glade, watching the sleeping form
through the vines. Every time her body twitches the anger grows.
Her life destroyed by someone that thought it was totally acceptable to
rob a child. She was the better me, the person that believed in the
world, believed there was good out there. And she paid for that.
She saw an opportunity to save us all, and with her bravery, with her sense
of justice she reached for it, she asked to be saved, and in returned got
damned forever. Is it any wonder that I am so angry most of the time,
I have seen the worst in people. I know what we are all so capable
of. When she reached out that day, she hoped it would all be over,
she believed him when he said he could rescue her from the torture she
had survived. When he took her, when he robbed her of all her hope,
all her justice she was so shocked, so unable to believe it she was trapped
here, trapped with that man. He not only robbed her of her escape
from the family, he also robbed her of being able to remain intact.
I became full that day, a person lost on my own. I listened to him
prattle on, in the car driving us back home, our body once again raped
and tortured. I watched silently as he and my mother exchange glances.
The code of child abusers, unbroken, forever safe. That look of superiority,
of conceited power. They knew, like I did at that moment, that no
one would intervene, that we were there's for as long as they wanted us.
That man went on his way, having killed a child, and created one in her
place, never to be seen again.
So now I do not tolerate people. I do not suffer the stupidity
of those around me. I see the truth and will speak it.
Consequences, there are always consequences to every action. I have
seen the worst, I no longer care about what else comes my way. But
it's about time others have to see the consequences of their actions, and
I will not save them from that.